Okay, this is a bit much…
by David • July 20, 2005 • WTF
An article posted in the Ars Lounge yesterday:
Teaching group to consider banning word "fail" - Yahoo! News
I can understand not wanting to demoralize kids, but really, that's taking it a little bit too far.
On the other hand, this presents some amazing possibilities for amusing euphemisms. I am not, for example, deaf. No, I'm just experiencing deferred hearing! (Deferred until my next life, presumably...)
What else can you come up with? I rather like "he's not dead, he's deferred breathing."
XaiaX's comment about "deferred employment" is great, too.

*BrassMUNK stabs everyone
I’m not bleeding, I’ve deferred coagulation.
Another two suggestions:
“It’s not slacking, it’s deferred productivity.”
“I wasn’t asleep, I just deferred consciousness.”